Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
