The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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