don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
handjob tips. give me some.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
It's blow job season.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Randomize
