My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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