I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
