We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
