butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
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