singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
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