I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Reggie can tackle my bush.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
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