i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
