I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
