Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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