Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
