I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Randomize
