Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
