I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
