i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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