David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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