dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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