he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
