I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
