I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
