The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Randomize
