You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
