we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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