Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
