singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Randomize
