I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize