they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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