There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
