found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize
