I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
