Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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