I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
