My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Randomize
