you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
how do you play pong handcuffed?
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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