So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
