you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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