I CAN MOONWALK!
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
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