dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
