they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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