we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize