And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
