but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
You can't just leave with hair like that
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
