i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
