So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
