so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
