she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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