So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Randomize
