i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
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