Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Randomize
